I did not stay up waaaaay too late the other night searching Craigslist for antique shutters and doors. I then did not sneak into the bathroom without the lights on so as not to wake up Jas. I did not reach into the medicine cabinet and accidentally start to wash my face with this:
Instead of this:
I did not take full advantage of a complete stressed-out-melt-down I had the other night. While Jas was rubbing my back so sweetly and telling me everything will be okay, and 'what would make me feel better?', I did not sob, "New curtains for the living rooooooooooommmmm..."
I did not sit on the computer and play the Webkinz "Smoothie Moves" games for about 2 hours the other day after I saw Miss O play it. And even if I did, it was to earn points so her elephant can go on a trip and buy a new bed, alright?!
I did not break one of my SERIOUS, NOT EVER ALLOWED rules in our house and let Luke jump on his bed (while naked, mind you) after I had bathed him and Morgan because she thought it was the funniest things she had EVER seen and I couldn't get enough of her precious little baby cackle. I am not waiting for him to do it again on his own and wind up in the ER. Again.
I did not actually have to call the phone company and ask the woman what our phone number was. She did not ask me if I was serious, since it has been our phone number for almost 5 months now.
I did not have one too many "sips" of wine the other night while making THE BEST spaghetti sauce ever (Heather and Lysh would not be so proud of my from-(kinda)- scratch creation). I did not giggle all through dinner. My children did not think this was great fun.
I did not spend 2 hours grocery shopping the other night. I did not purposely stroll up and down every aisle at a turtle's pace, just because I was actually by myself. I ADORE spending every second with my precious family and HATE grocery shopping, so this is something I simply would not do!
I did not reluctantly agree to share one of my coveted Slim-Fast chocolate chip granola bars with Luke. After he had 3 bites of his and set it on the end table, I did not switch it with my almost finished one. What mother would do that? Its not like they are that good!
7 comments:
Hysterical! :D Boy, does that sound like one of my mondays... lol
AHHH...the grocery store by yourself...I'm JEALOUS!! What was it like? LOL!!
too funny. It almost seems like time goes so much faster when there are not children hanging all over you. . .Thanks for checking out my blog
Oh that makes me laugh...you log into Webkinz too? Every once in a while I do the same...the games are fun and don't require shooting anyone for pete's sake!! My kids are always pleased with the money I make for them!! Bed jumping while naked, oh that's a favorite around here too (and no, not by me OR my husband).....
I love Not me Mondays! And that's too funny about your face washing stuff. :)`
Bhhhhaaaaa! Really good ones! I didn't know about webkins taking a trip. I soooo play my daughters sometimes. I can't help it, it's addictive.
Excellent post! Loved it!
Mrs. Nurse Boy
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