Well. Today I felt like I was a featured guest on this show:
And I am the blond guy in this picture: See that guy kicking my hopes and dreams out of me? Yea. It was pretty much just like that.
As of last evening the following things happened:
I was late to take the nursing school entrance test thanks to traffic on 635. This actually ended up not being such a bad thing because a) I'm not sure it was going to be the best place for me and b) I now KNOW that it is not the best place for me. I freaked out a little after last night. So I did some more research today and realized that to do what I really want to do, I have to go the RN route. No quick-y nursing trade school for me.
So now I am no longer looking at a 13 month time frame, but one more like 3 years. I went from looking at putting my kiddos in full day daycare at $480 A WEEK for one year, to now 3 (I'll give you a minute to do that math and choke on whatever it is your sipping on, like I did). I now have to wait to even APPLY til January of next year, only to wait to START in August of next year. I am looking at Monday through Friday, 8 am to 4pm, instead of Monday through Thursday, 9am to 3pm. I am looking at completing my degree when Morgan is older than Luke is now- which hurts my brain. I am looking at a dead-end dream because there is simply no way to make all of these new requirements work. There is not enough hours in the day or money in the bank. I have looked at it from every angle: A different school maybe?: I've called every school in a 50 mile radius and its the same story. Move back to our Shonka house to save money and be near friends and family? That puts us in limbo again, which is precisely what we are trying to get out of. Get a nanny in the morning to take the kids to school at 9? Yea right. Online courses? I am a hands-on learner. I have prayed. I have cried. I have put a request for any plan or idea out into the universe and hope that something will come back. I am feeling beat up. I am feeling like all this is my fault for not knowing what I wanted to do until I was 30, and life has just taken me to a place where that really just isn't feasible. It just doesn't make sense, seeing has how all of those things that have happened to me are the reasons I want to do this in the first place...
It just sucks because I was excited.
And now I've had an official WWE Smackdown.